A Werewolf Blog in Brooklyn

Feel the power! (of 3 wolves) | September 3, 2009

There is a power in the universe, and indeed the werewolf culture, that I feel I need to warn everyone about.

No one has yet to understand the full magnitude of it!
It was previously unheard of.

But then Amazon.com unleashed it onto the world.
Totally unaware of what they were doing by selling, yes, that’s right, selling the Three Wolves T-shirt .

I was reminded of this the other night when I was out and about and saw someone wearing one of these t-shirts. Clearly a local who was paying homage, in their own way, to lunar week.

But the Three wolves T-shirt wasn’t designed for mere mortals to wear.
I’m sure of it.

Many werewolves speculate about it’s awesome power that so many recipients speak of.

Who are those three wolves?
Are they from New York?
Are they Breukelen? (I don’t think so, I’m pretty sure I’d recognize them if they were)
When was their image captured?
Why did they allow their images to be captured & used like this?
Does this mean werewolves are a sellout?
What does that even mean?
How does this power transfer work on all these humans?
What if this power is used for evil and not good?

It’s all an amazing modern day mystery.

All we can assume is that the three wolves in the T-shirt design are powerful. I mean, really, GOD-LIKE, Like Ashton Kutcher on Twitter or something. I mean, he said he wanted a million followers and bam said the lady! He got himself a million followers in a day!

Go Aplusk go!

Clearly Ashton is harnessing the Three Wolves t-shirt power for his own advantage. Who could blame him? If only Larry King had clued into that before challenging him to the twitter popularity contest! Sucker!

I mean, that’s how full on this T-shirt is.
It even comes with a warning! A sticker on it, that says “Feel the power”. It should have after it “IF YOU DARE!”

Humans are not ready for werewolf power.
That’s why those not born a werewolf, but rather struck down with Lycanthropy, have such a hard time embracing their new forms and getting through their first round of full moon furry.

Or more correctly, they are not ready for werewolf power of The Three Wovles T-shirt!

It is something of a phenomenon. There must be something unique about the three wolves in the t-shirt that they can bring such sexual prowess to people.

Like J Jones from of all places, New Jersey.

J Jones has stated of the Three Wolves Tshirt’s affects after he brought it – “With cigarette dangling from her lip and scratching at the curlers in her hair, the owner of my trailer park winked at me and said she liked the wolves on my t-shirt. I winked back at her and looked her up and down in her flip-flops, denim skirt and flannel shirt and said I’d give her a howling good time, if she let me. She said she’d hit that as long as I kept the t-shirt on. I am no longer a virgin. Thank you three wolves t-shirt. ”

Now if someone from New Jersey can find an instant mate through the Three Wolves T-shirt, what else is even possible whilst wearing it?

Well just ask M Farmer from Raleigh North Carolina – “I had heard about the power that the 3 wolves T shirt can bring it’s wearer. But I dared not believe. For I have been teased my whole life about being a nerd. But a friend of mine bought me a 3 wolves t-shirt for my birthday. When I opened up my package, the rain clouds parted, the sun shone down on me and I’m fairly certain a choir of angels started singing as I pulled my t-shirt out and laid it on my chest. Already I felt the world realigning itself, just from being so close to the greatness that is the 3 Wolves T-shirt. It was a bit like that moment in the Superman 2 when Superman flys around the world backwards, to reverse time so he can save Louis Lane. Only GREATER. Then I put it on…My gods are now the 3 wolves on my T-shirt. I bow down to them. I have been on actual real dates with actual real girls, not on the internet who do not playing hide the sausage. I can now get into nightclubs, because I am always being mistaken for being Johnny Depp. I understand now how to be cool and I owe it all to my 3 wolves T-shirt. I’ve since bought six more, so I have a clean one for each day of the week.”

Or how about HowlerHoward562 from Japan:

“I was given the 3 wolves t-shirt as a gag gift. There is nothing funny about the greatness that the 3 wolves T-shirt has. It has mystical qualities surrounding it. After I wore the 3 wolves t-shirt for the first time, I found myself a changed man. Suddenly I had a full head of hair, my teeth were straight and white! I started wearing my 3 wolves t-shirt under my shirt at work. Suddenly the boss of the company was noticing me more and more and actually knew my name! Prior to this, we had never spoken before. He kept saying he could see my potential, within a month I was promoted to a position in the company I had previously not a chance in hell of getting, Because I had not applied for it. I was moved out of my cubicle and into a corner office. I’m certain it’s because of the 3 wolves T-shirt, which I now refuse to take off at all.”

Cubicle Friend says
“I was having a lousy year. I had lost things dear to me…especially my ipod nano. I sat on it, and broke it. It was in my back pocket. I could no longer hear the sweet voice of Whitney Houston in my ears, getting me hyped up for my job.

But then, for my birthday, my evil over lords at work gave me a 3 wolf and moon t-shirt. Now, the voices are clear in my head! I can hear the singing! I finally believe that yes, I can dance with somebody! I can dance with Jessica from cubicle 337, and she will like it, and not scream Inappropriate touchings!

Thankyou 3 wolf and moon t-shirt. You have given me hope and light to my life. I will always have you! Even if Whitney has made a comeback and sounds like sh….”

*All names have been changed to protect the bearers of the Three Wolves T-shirts, from being hunted down and ravaged by sexually horny housewives and desperately dishy, trail park girls.

*All names have been changed to protect the bearers of the Three Wolves T-shirts, from being hunted down from evil villains who might seek to harness the power of the Three Wolves T-shirt for world domination.

Power to the (werewolf) people!
Peace out.

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