A Werewolf Blog in Brooklyn

Restless | February 23, 2010

The restlessness is like an itch that can’t be scratched. It’s deeper than skin, it sinks into my pores and through my muscles.

My wolf is pacing.
She needs an out. Wants to roam and run free.

This is the feeling I battle when lunar week is upon me. I have to let my wolf know that I’m the one in control of her. That she can come out, when I say she can.

So I crunch some ice-blocks in my mouth loudly and contemplate what I’m going to do to keep the feeling at bay, to ignore the impossible and to not go mad in the process of feeling so uselessly restless.

Physical outlets are the best for this kind of sensation. Keep the body working, moving, occupied and the rest of it falls into a rhythm, as energy is burned and the mind is freed, from the distraction of thinking about, control and how to control. When really, doing something physical, for a long enough period of time, means you’re already half way there. Without thinking about the wolf and your own battle with it. It’s like body memory.

There is a physical outlet I use during lunar weeks – well, pretty much all werewolves use it. But even before I get to that enjoyable stage of the week or night, this feeling just grows steadily upon me as the lunar week kicks off.

The Alpha wolves aren’t as easily affected us Beta wolves like me. So I guess you could say I’m more susceptible to things.

Some werewolves, take to the gym, they’ll do workouts and weights for hours and hours, until some stupid trainer comes up to them and “advises” them that they have to take a break, or they could you know, be banned from the gym, due to health and safety and legal reasons. But not me.

Dancing is a good outlet, Latin dancing. Swinging the hips, loosing yourself in the rhythmic beat of music, feeling your body unwind as it twists and turns and grinds and pulses with another. As you move hip to hip, and chest to chest, and one body temperature is all you both feel as sweat beads across your skin.

You know, it’s like the closest you can get to another person, with your clothes on and not get into trouble. Okay, you can still get into a fair bit of trouble, but mostly it’s all laughed off.

The trick for me, is to do my salsa dancing workout with a non, not another werewolf. If it were with another werewolf in lunar week, the restlessness wouldn’t subside, wouldn’t loose focus, wouldn’t die down. Even if it’s not with my pack partner. Rather it would amp it up and that’s what night time, play time is for kiddies.

Working out, on the other hand is the how to get through the rest of the lunar week time, way of coping. You could look at it like the wolf inside, is more oppressed if I’ve got a physical outlet, but it isn’t with another werewolf, so she backs down, and the body for lack of a better description, because this one isn’t really that accurate, calms down.

It’s a way to cope, until the day devours the night and the night opens it’s arms to the werewolves of Brooklyn and greater New York and we seek our control’s slow release through pleasure.

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