A Werewolf Blog in Brooklyn

Head explosions | September 8, 2010

From formspring I present the latest question thrown at me.
What would your life be like if Conall wasn’t in it? Would you even want him out of your life? 😛

Agghhh.

I feel like if I answer this honestly, the paranoid part of me says word will get back to Conall on how I “feel” and he’ll think he’s still got reason to try again with me.

Merde.

Okay, here’s the thing. Conall and me, have been around each other for a long time. I mean, we’ve been in and out of each other’s lives for years and years. We’re in the same pack, so we’d see each other at pack gatherings, we’d know the same friends, I guess you could say it’s not that I hate him. He pisses me off and makes me angry and is a regular pain in the butt. But he’s male, so that’s to be expected. But it wasn’t always bad between us. The ending of us was bad. But not the whole time we were together.

So….what would my life be like without Conall in it?

Well, if Conall had never come along I might’ve ended up with someone else, initially at least. I might’ve had the guts to pursue that person. But that’s a lot of “might’s” Or I might be just dating randomly and partying all the time. Or I might just be who I am but without half the stress that Conall seems to bring with him and us. Sometimes I think we’re so corrosive on one another. Other times, I think we used to make a good team, him and I, when we were strong.

Would I even want him out of my life?

Agggghhh.

Hindsight is fucking useless except to remind you to remember shit you’d rather forget. Most of the time, I think yes. But overall, in the personal history of me, I guess I’d say no. Oh I don’t fucking know okay? I tend to believe things happen in your life for a reason, that things shape you for reasons like helping make you who you should be. Mistakes included. Conall included.

Merde.

Are we done with the Dr Phil Introspection now?

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