A Werewolf Blog in Brooklyn

Truth and Honesty

June 13, 2014
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I don’t like hurt.

Especially the emotional kind of hurt. It does something to the body. Leaves marks on your soul. It weighs on you and damages part of who you are, in tiny fragments that sometimes heal, but forever leave an invisible scar. It doesn’t feel good and it takes too long to make sense of and get over.

The thing is, some people, are brilliant at emotional hurt. They can manipulate and deceive and impact that thing in you that will cripple you badly. They’re the ones who like hurt, hurting others.

Humans can never wrap their head around the logic of that motive. But the reality is, it’s like a sensation, a high, a good feeling, a normal impulse for them to hurt others. A natural response. An instinct. It’s in their nature and they can’t fight it.
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t need to be wrapped in cotton wool. I’ve never really led a charmed life. It’s been rough all over and if all you know is rough, then all you know to do is roll with it, survive it. Which is what I’d been doing for years. I’ve been doing the best I can. Anyway I can. Anyway that suited me and helped me and got me what I wanted out of this life.

Hurting someone like me, with my ‘talent’, gift, ability whatever you want to call it, it’s more than hurtful. It’s more than a passing thing if it’s done right. It’s damaging. Blindingly damaging. It’s like taking all your feelings, and perceptions and everything you have at your disposal and putting them off line. It changes your insides and remakes you.

It’s why I’ve always been a loner. I learned long ago, that I couldn’t do my thing, I couldn’t read people; get their truth, if they ruined parts of mine. It’s why I’ve never had a relationship. Never allowed myself to feel all those things, that so many people take for granted in being human. Love, passion, desire, want and need, trust and companionship.

Those things are the downfall of someone like me. They counter more than they feed. I don’t want to lose a part of myself to that, because it happened once before when I was young and it wasn’t good, it was bad, very bad, and not just for me. The truth can hurt, and it can set you free, but at what expense?

People don’t know where that saying came from and it’s probably a very good thing, because if you saw what I could set free, from within me, you’d be beyond scared. You’d be cowering before me.

I know what lies inside me and it isn’t good. Nobody can see it, because nobody knows to look for it. To think of it. Because the truth is, what you make of it and nobody makes much of me, because that’s the way I like it.

Guess that’s a form of deception, an odd thing for a truthful person to do. Maybe I’m not as pure as my abilities might make me seem. After all, I use them by giving them to the person who’s willing to pay the right price.

Does that make me an honest soul?


A Werewolf Podcast – coming soon!

May 31, 2014
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Get ready world. My podcast series is launching soon.

Stay tuned for more details, follow me on Twitter or talk to me on The Werewolf Blog in Brooklyn Facebook page about it…

RWW_alt3BB


Wolves Love

April 11, 2014
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Wolves Love

Werewolves and lycans aren’t known for getting along.

You could argue that hostility and hatred of the lycans can’t be faulted. Given, to be a lycan, means as a human you were attacked by a werewolf and survived, only to turn into one of them.

Tatum Lee only knows this existence all too well as a new lycan. It’s only been a few months since she turned and has found herself in a relationship, with of all creatures, a werewolf, Wiatt D’arenberg. But loving Wiatt means, Tatum has to live by the rules of Wiatt’s pack , and it means there’s not much living in it when the Bronx lycan community find out exactly who Tatum is.

She’s either one of them, or she’s not welcome, just like werewolves in the Bronx aren’t welcome. Tatum’s relationship with Wiatt becomes strained as she battles to find her place in her new wolf life, with Wiatt and amongst all the wolves of New York City.

Wiatt finds his thinking pushed as he must confront the reality of the werewolf culture and his own personal happiness with a lycan for his lover. Can Wiatt and Tatum find a way to make a relationship between two very different types of wolves work? Or will they simply be torn apart, by each other and every other wolf that wants to hurt them?

Available at www.smashwords.com in July


Shadow Games

February 15, 2014
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Being a truth-sayer has its moments. For Katelyn Phoenix it would most notably have to be when the man she found herself falling in love with Shadow Demon, Tarin Armadel tried to kill her.

Katelyn doesn’t want to see Tarin’s face again as she reverts to truth sayer form, as a demi-god named Asha to protect her heart from Tarin’s emotional betrayal. Being a truth-sayer has its moments. For Katelyn Phoenix it would most notably have to be when the man she found herself falling in love with Shadow Demon, Tarin Armadel tried to kill her. Katelyn doesn’t want to see Tarin’s face again as she reverts to truth sayer form, as a demi-god named Asha to protect her heart from Tarin’s emotional betrayal.

But Katelyn finds out that the broken hearted don’t get to time out to hide out from life, when paranormal beings think you’re a threat of to them and want you dead. Time won’t stand still for her to figure out if Tarin’s even telling her the truth about how he feels about her.

Forced to team up with Tarin in order to get to the bottom of who wants her dead and why, Katelyn finds out that the paranormal world is far more sinister than it seems and that the shadow demon might be the least of her problems.


Shadow Aspect

June 28, 2013
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If I get five more likes on my facebook page I’ll post the first chapter of something new I’m working on…

Shadow aspect


Comfort

January 26, 2010
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I think I found my happy place.

Everyone should have a happy place like this.

It’s under fresh cotton sheets, in the crook of Paris’s arm. Our bodies touching and the warmth that flows from him, keeps me heated too. His heart beat is like a persistent soundtrack in my ear as he plays with my hair, brushing his fingers along the top of my head. The morning light streams into the room, through the not quite tightly shut wooden slates.

Hmm, I don’t want this feeling to end, feels like comfort.

He’s trying to convince me I need to stay in Brooklyn for awhile, while he deals with Black Dog in Manhattan.

I turn around, out of the crook of his arm, lean on my arms and face him. This is not the way I want to start my morning, after finally, getting him back to his place, after the whole Black Dog thing. By the time we’d gotten back, I was more than in need of release and shape shifting wasn’t going to take the edge off that kind of need. In fact, it can make lunar lust worse, some times, especially during lunar week. Like it’s not hard enough to get through in one raggered piece.

He pulls me in closer to him. So we were touching, again skin on skin. Pushing the sheet down off my back, so my lower back is exposed he walks his fingers across my body. Sliding his hands down to cup my bottom.

I can feel his body responding, already recovered from our first round, ready to go again.

“It’s this thing with Black Dog.” Paris sighs heavily. “He saw you at Crescent the other night and I think he liked what he saw.”

For now, it appears, Black Dog is happy to leave the Manhattan Pack alone. His hands move my legs apart as I lay, half on his body, looking back at him. His fingers brush over sensitive skin and I move my thighs further apart.

“His eyes, they bleed red, when he’s….excited. He calls it blood lust. Never really told us why it happens or what it means, But I’m pretty sure it means attraction. It happened after he spotted you. He probably sees this as an opportunity to mess with me and mine.”

Blood lust.

I’ve heard of this before. It’s not a common trait in most werewolves these days. I think it is the one thing that kind of has been weeded out of the werewolf lines through the generations. Not sure how. But I think it’s more common in other paranormal beings than it is in werewolves.

Only I thought it always kind of resembled another emotion, that of rage.

I can’t help but feel cold inside after that thought. Even with Paris’s hot touch on my body.


The gothic nature of our beasts

November 9, 2009
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As the world gears up to handle the hysteria that will sweep teenagers everywhere with the release of the new Twilight movie, New Moon, I’m reminded again – in fact more and more these days, I see media and people asking why are people attracted to vampires, why are they so popular as opposed to werewolves.

One Twitter follower stated, that she thought women were attracted to the notion of vampires because they represented in a way, the knight in shining armour sweeping the woman away on a white horse, but with a hint of danger.

Sorry, but I don’t ever want to meet a dead guy on a white horse, especially if it puts my life in danger, or if his horses name is “Pestilence” and there are three other guys riding horses with him!

Hello end of the world is so much further than “hint of danger”!

I’ve read somewhere else that a journalist believes we all have a gothic side to us therefore gothic equals love and understanding of all things vampiric.

Yeah well, disputing that.

I don’t consider myself to be gothic. The online dictionary, says gothic is:

noting or pertaining to a style of architecture
I may have my bad body days where I might say I feel as bloated as a house, but I don’t think I resemble “architecture” when I say that or when I don’t, on my good days.

pertaining to or designating the style of painting, sculpture characterized by a tendency toward realism and interest in detail.
Well I am very much a REAL person and if by details they mean gossip, then we could be on to something with this one..

pertaining to Goths or their language
I have no idea what a “Goth” in this sense is – let me check the dictionary again. Okay it says A member of a Germanic people who invaded the Roman Empire in the early centuries of the Christian era.
Again, way before my time. Also, I don’t speak the Deutschland. I do however know a bit of French, Dutch and the odd Norwegian word or two.

pertaining to the music, esp. of northern Europe, of the period roughly from 1200 to 1450
– um, No.

pertaining to the Middle Ages; medieval
NO, wasn’t born then, and don’t consider myself to be any kind of evil, let alone medieval.

barbarous or crude
Only when drunk. So that’s what, barely ever?

noting or pertaining to a style of literature characterized by a gloomy setting, grotesque, mysterious, or violent events
hmm, sometimes my life might seem to be characterized by a few of these elements, but I don’t dwell in it.

noting or pertaining to the alphabetical script introduced for the writing of
Gothic by Ulfilas

No I do not write like this with that script – I use times new roman font.

being of a genre of contemporary fiction typically relating the experiences of an often ingenuous heroine imperiled, as at an old mansion

hmm, I have heard people call my place a mansion before. But no.

So I don’t think I fall into this love-fest everyone is having with the concept of Vampires.

Yes, I’ve watched the shows, Buffy and True Blood which are great. But I have never once, associated myself with the vampire characters, and I have never once, wanted to be with the vampire characters.

I’ve always seen myself with the human characters because that’s who I live around. Beause I embrace my human side, and enjoy that part of it. That’s the world I’m in.

I think mostly that people want to fall in romantic lust with the undead vampires because they’ve been portrayed by very pretty and charismatic people on TV and screen. Because ‘paranormal’ people, such as yours truly, have something to offer the nons. The fans of the paranormal. They first think of escapisim and some sort of happy little fantasy that measures up to their ideal in their head.

Because it looks like they come from a very exciting and different world. And it probably beats going to an office job five days a week.

Of course, our paranormal lives, might be very normal by nons standards if these so called fans of vampires and werewolves were to be a vampire/werewolf ALL the time. What would they then want to be? – A human?

Oh and aren’t I (and all paranormals for that matter) meant to believe that’s what paranormal beings are striving for thier whole lives? like it’s our ideal?

But it concerns me that people are attracted to blood drinkers, these ‘vampires’ only need blood to survive. And more often than not, as shown in these shows and movies, they get their blood from their loved one. Draining them a little bit more each time its needed of life.

I kind of see that like being in an oddly abusive relationship. “You must give me what I need to survive.” – if vampires are so immortal like, you’d have think they’d figure out a way to get the blood without demanding it of their loved ones after all this time and the time in the world to figure that out.

But again the portrayal of this notion leads us to believe it’s done as an act of love either self sacrificing or not.

I understand the attraction of blood too, because my werewolf, is attracted to it. It’s kind of like, you can take so much out of the evolution scale but blood will always be part of the werewolf.

Doesn’t mean I demand it of those around me, but the animal inside of me is aware of it, and attracted to it, because it’s a predatory thing. Part of the werewolf make up.

Oh and that’s another thing, why don’t people see vampires as predators that are a danger not something that can give you a ‘hint’ of dangerous excitement?

I mean, niave much?

I think the reason people seem to like vampires is because quite simply put, they resemble, according to most folklore and movies and tv shows, humans. Yes, that’s about it. So humans are seen as more attractive and on the level of attraction to other humans than an animal. They think bestiality when they shouldn’t.

Plus, werewolves have been getting a bad wrap for so long, they’ve always been portrayed as “monsters” while the PR machine has been working over time in turning the image of the vampire around into some sort of misunderstood, moody, romantic lead, worthy of its un dead life.

But really if that’s all it takes to make someone like you, then again, its just about how not far, humans have come.

How shallow to like vampires because of their looks and at the same time, use that against werewolves because they loose their human image. But it does not mean werewolves loose their humanity, unlike Vampires.

But as it turns out, Nons are a vain lot (no pun intended) and they’d rather believe in what they can see (looks) and be fooled by these things than true intention. Hence, vampire popularity.Which you would think, in the scale of morals, deep seeded truths, and need for emotional connection, that would count for more than it does, in the image and reputation of the werewolf.

Which seems a likely truth of the gothic nature of our own – vampire, werewolf, human – personal beasts.


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